


Say Yes to Me

by Ketz



Series: A Song of Choice [2]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types
Genre: Celeb au, M/M, Malec, Ragnor is still too sassy for his own good, Singer Alec, Singer Magnus, and so is Sari Bane, no cheating though so don't you guys worry about that, yes they broke up at the start of the fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-12
Updated: 2018-03-12
Packaged: 2019-03-30 03:22:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,871
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13941516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ketz/pseuds/Ketz
Summary: Four years after the events of the Angel’s Voice, Alec and Magnus have broken up. Both of them have moved on with their professional and personal lives, but no amount of success can fill up that gap for the love they still have for each other. Even if they insist on staying as far away from each other as possible.That is until an irrefutable invitation comes up. Now, Alec and Magnus have no choice but to work together once again. This collaboration could end up in a complete disaster.Or, it could end up in them finally finding their way back to each other.





	Say Yes to Me

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, guys <3
> 
> So I was listening to a certain malec song and imagining how great would be if Alec and Magnus sang it together.
> 
> And then I remembered I have a singers!au already done to make way for that possibility.
> 
> For those who are into that kind of thing, I put together a [list on Spotify](https://open.spotify.com/user/12181959141/playlist/1cqC4htSlauWKs6ImeVopc?si=r7jrHxzER-Oy-n6e6fwrvw) with all the songs used in the story. Enjoy!
> 
> Alright, let's do this.

_April, 2016_

_Hello, avid readers. This is your favorite reporter, Ragnor Fell, bringing you the juiciest news of your favorite celebrities here on my humble blog._

_Weeks in anticipation finally paid off! Stellar singer Magnus Bane’s first solo concert performance was a huge success. After his outstanding participation in The Angel’s Voice, Magnus Bane rose to fame, picking up the interest of the entire nation. However, it remained to be seen if he could keep up his popularity when it came to his original work._

_At last, fans weren’t disappointed (I hate to say ‘I said so,’ but I did, many times). Magnus put together a powerhouse assembly of songs of his own making. His first album, Pandemonium, is a tremendous success. One can hardly turn on the radio and avoid listening to The High Warlock. I know because I’ve tried._

_But if yesterday’s concert was any indication of what is coming, Magnus is thirsty for more. And we all are thankful for it._

_Click here for pictures of last night’s performance. For exclusive PG 13+ pictures of proud boyfriend Alec Lightwood congratulating Magnus backstage,  click here. I’m keeping the R-rated ones all to myself._

_\---_

_June, 2016_

_Hello, avid readers. This is your favorite reporter, Ragnor Fell, bringing you the juiciest news of your favorite celebrities here on my humble blog._

_Singer and songwriter Alec Lightwood has officially postponed the release of his new album, “Arrows and Bows.” After a brief announcement last week, his agent Luke Garroway broke the silence. You can check out his statement here._

_Apparently, there have been some artistic differences in the producing process of the album. There is no information on a new date for the album to come out._

_It seems we will have to keep_ Mercy _on repeat for a while longer. Good thing we can still hear Alec’s beautiful voice in his latest released song,_ Shape of You _, with boyfriend Magnus Bane._

_\---_

_September, 2016_

_Hello, avid readers. This is your favorite reporter, Ragnor Fell, bringing you the juiciest news of your favorite celebrities here on my humble blog._

_Unless you’ve been living under a rock or in a homophobic state, you already know what happened just last night. The King and King of the music industry, Alec Lightwood and Magnus Bane, just got engaged. Alec’s sweet proposal happened during a cozy dinner at his place. Trust me, dear readers, for I was the one who helped Alec choose the rings._

_After eleven months of dating, the couple is ready to tie the knot! That should squash any unsavory rumors of trouble in paradise. It seems you all, adored readers, got blindsided by mean spirited gossip._

_Check out the pictures of the loving grooms on Magnus’ Instagram. Yes, that is a discarded burned chicken in the trash in the background. I said cozy dinner, not edible. Sweet Alec was probably too nervous to pay attention as he cooked._

_\---_

_October, 2016_

_Hello, avid readers. This is your favorite reporter, Ragnor Fell, bringing you the juiciest news of your favorite celebrities here on my humble blog._

_Rejoice, everyone! Magnus Bane’s first World Tour is a go! Starting next month, he has shows set up in New York, Chicago, and San Francisco. London, Paris, and Milan are next on his list. The tour should end after Magnus conquers East Asia with shows in Tokyo, Bangkok, and his family hometown, Jakarta._

_The entire thing will take daunting seven months. Rumor has it that fiancé Alec Lightwood will join him in London during Valentine’s Day, but nothing has been confirmed yet. All is known is that Alec has his own commitments in the US and will not be accompanying Magnus on tour._

_Still scrambling for a ticket? Click here to buy it!_

_\---_

_February, 2017_

_Hello, avid readers. This is your favorite reporter, Ragnor Fell, bringing you the juiciest news of your favorite celebrities here on my humble blog._

_I regret to say the rumors are true. Alec Lightwood and Magnus Bane have broken up their engagement and are no longer on speaking terms. Due to my proximity to Magnus Bane, this is all I will say on the matter. Please respect their privacy in this difficult time._

_On the more cheerful news, Magnus is on his way to Paris and his World Tour will not be affected by his personal life. Everything shall continue as planned, aside from “Shape of You,” which will be no longer feature in his song lists._

_Unrelated, click here for Alec Lightwood’s personal phone number. Give him hell._

\---

Magnus woke up with his phone ringing against hard wood. Not an uncommon occurrence, but it never failed to annoy him. That meant his phone was somewhere on the floor and not on his bedside table, like it was supposed to be. Again. 

He really ought to take better care of his things instead of throwing them aside once he was done with them.

Groaning, Magnus rolled on his bed. He groped at the floor, searching for the damn phone. With some luck, he wouldn’t have to get out of the bed to reach it. Thankfully, Magnus found it after a lazy minute and stared at the screen. No wonder he was feeling like he had been run over by a train. If his phone was indeed in the right time zone - and he sincerely couldn’t remember if it was -, Magnus had only slept for three hours.

Luke would be so delighted to know that. “Yes?” Magnus answered his agent, surprising even himself with how hoarse his voice sounded.

“Tell me you weren’t sleeping. It’s almost two in the afternoon,” Luke said with almost no patience. The distinguishable sound of the record company buzzed in the back.

Magnus rolled over and landed on his back. He closed his eyes, bothered by the light cracking into the bedroom. What was the point in buying that penthouse again? It had way too many huge windows. “Not in Japan, it isn’t.”

“True. Just like the fact that you’ve been back from Japan for a week now. I know because I was the one that sent the car to pick you up at the airport.” 

“And I’m dutifully thankful for it.” Magnus moved to sit up. He poured himself a glass of water water, taking a few sips. “I am also thankful for the schedule you’ve emailed me yesterday, in which I had no appointments whatsoever until the weekend. Since today is Wednesday, I am free to enjoy my jetlag in peace.”

Luke huffed. “Today is Thursday and your agenda just got filled up. And no, no more cameos in movies.”

Magnus sighed in relief. There were just so many movie appearances he could make before it drove him completely crazy. Actors were exhausting. Who knew that winning a Grammy for Best Video Clip would lead to to guest-starring at so many dreadful romantic comedies and weird sci-fi adventures? Hollywood was really desperate. “So, not a cameo. What then? I don’t have any songs planned that I recall of.”

Interestingly, Luke hesitated for a second. It wasn’t such a huge pause, but it was enough to raise Magnus’ suspicions. “Max is turning eighteen this year in October.”

“Already?! He’s just a kid.” Magnus was blown away. Little Max was only fourteen when they met, back when Magnus’ entire life was about to change forever. The Angel’s Voice brought back a lot of memories, good and bad ones. Max was among the best and he had only became more and more important to Magnus. But Max also made Magnus think of someone else. 

Alexander. 

How long had it been since the break up? Two years? 

And yet, Magnus didn’t find the strength to be over him. Just the thought of Alec made his heart tighten in his chest. Magnus still didn’t know how he managed to face Alec in the award shows every year. Lots of alcohol, of course, but even that wasn’t enough to distract him. Being in the same room as Alec was suffocating, no matter how big a room was or how many people were standing between them.

Luke chuckled on the other side of the line. “Yes, but kids grow up. He’ll be a man soon. And he wants to celebrate that with all the people who helped him along the way.”

“That’s so sweet,” Magnus said, trying to sound casual. He could feel his heartbeat start to race, but another sip of water helped him calm down. ‘All the people’ meant Alexander too. Magnus may have stopped to talk to Alec, but he knew for certain Max and Alec were still very close. Max would always let something about Alec slip out when he and Magnus hang out. Aside from the media, the boy was Magnus’ best accidental informant. “A big party, hm?”

“More like a concert. Max wants to put together an ensemble of people in October. The money would go for a charity of his choosing.” Luke sounded like a proud father. “It’s a terrific idea. I told him you’d be thrilled. Was I right?”

Magnus smiled, feeling just as proud. Max had turned up to be an amazing young man and that was, in fact, a terrific idea. He could deal with his feelings toward Alec for one night. Max came first. “As always, my friend.”

“Good,” Luke said fondly. And then he hesitated again. What was that all about? “There’s one more thing, though.”

Oh. Magnus had the feeling he would regret answering his phone in the next couple of seconds. “What?”

Another pause. This was just torture. “Max wants you and Alec to perform together. Before you say no,” Luke continued quickly, “you should know that Alec already agreed to it.”

“Did he really?” Magnus highly doubted that. “Or are you only saying that so I’ll feel petty and childish if I decline? Alexander and I have a non-verbal agreement to avoid each other at all costs. He doesn’t get down to Brooklyn and I stay as far away as possible from the Upper-East Side. I’ve missed fashion shows because of that. I’ve actually wanted to attend a few of them.”

Luke sighed. “All right. I haven’t talked to him yet. But do you really believe Alec will say no to Max?”

Yes, if he cherished his life. Or public image. Ragnor had made Alec enemy number one after the breakup and Magnus was not afraid to call his friend for help. The journalist had a stack of dirt on Alec, which Magnus knew because he had refused to look at when Ragnor offered it to him. But Magnus was not above taking his refusal back in desperate times.

But little Max… Alec would do anything for him. Nothing Ragnor had on Alec would stop the singer if it would make Max happy. Nothing.

“He’ll say yes,” Magnus admitted. “He loves the boy too much. Dammit, Luke.” He played with his rings, realizing just then that he had fallen asleep still wearing them. It made him think of something lying in a cabinet in the living room. In the third drawer.. A ring he had kept locked there for two years. Magnus gritted his teeth. “I’ll do it. For Max. And this better not be one of your plans to force Alexander and I to talk. They didn’t work in the past and it won’t work now.”

Luke chuckled softly, relief in his voice. “Oh, no. I’ve learned my lesson after the fiasco last year at the Grammys. This is all per Max’s request. He’ll be very happy.”

“Good,” Magnus said. At least, one of them would.

\--

The record label looked exactly the same as Alec remembered it. A soothing thought, considering that he had just spent five months away from the limelight, hiding in his family countryside house. It felt like coming home, a familiar place that offered safety, where he could be himself. He would need that comfort as the day progressed. 

“For Max,” Alec whispered to himself, “remember, you’re doing this for Max.”

Inhaling deeply, Alec walked in and found the room Luke had reserved for the day. This had been one of Alec’s conditions when the agent had called to ask him to be a part of Max’s eighteenth birthday concert. Alec had agreed to it immediately, knowing full well everything that it implied. But that didn’t mean he’d do it blindly. No way. It hurt too much to simply see Magnus. He had no idea what working with Magnus would be like after all this time.

So, Alec had a few requests of his own. The meetings would take place at the record label, a neutral ground for both of them. No announcements of the partnership before the concert, only that both of them would be a part of it. No mandatory publicly appearances together, before or after the concert. And, lastly, they would be performing a new song.

If Alec had to listen to _Shape of You_ one more time, he’d lose it for good.

When Luke informed him that Magnus had agreed to those terms, there was no going back. Alec had told Isabelle, but, otherwise, only Luke and Magnus knew he’d be doing this. It kind of felt like a dirty secret,. For some reason, Alec was actually ashamed to tell Jace, Simon or Maia. They were his friends, yes, but Alec knew what they’d say about him working with Magnus again. A bad idea. Bound to failure. That Alec would only end up hurting both of them again.

After all, Magnus hadn’t even looked at his direction when Luke had put them both at the same table at the Grammys. How could Alec consider writing and performing a song together?

“For Max,” Alec reminded himself once again. 

He found the room and walked in. Nobody was there yet. Then again, Magnus wasn’t known for his punctuality and two years wouldn’t have changed that. Besides, Alec was a few minutes early. He needed the time to prepare himself.

Funny enough, Alec didn’t feel mad anymore, which was a good sign. The anger had gone away with time, leaving only emptiness in its place. Alec had tried his hardest to fill up that emptiness, to distract himself from it and pretend it didn’t exist. One night stands, learning how to play the piano, writing his own songs. Nothing had really worked, though. Alec would release a thousand new albums before he started to feel whole again.

It was only when he was around his loved ones that the sadness would relent. His piano lessons with Isabelle, his night outs with Jace, listening to Simon’s endless rambles or hanging out with Maia. In these moments, Alec felt happy again. Genuinely happy. But, as soon as he was back in his apartment, the sad memories came back. He remembered that he had screwed up the best thing that had ever happened to him. 

But Alec was not screwing this up. Max deserved the best Alec and Magnus could do. Once, that meant magic. It could mean magic again.

A single knock on the door sent Alec back in time for a second. Magnus was there, looking as dashing as ever. The years as a consolidated star had only made the singer look even more handsome. Magnus had always had a effortless confidence in the way he moved, but now he had a true elegance to it. His mere presence commanded everyone’s attention. Magnus was no simple artist; he was an icon. He had always been one, even when he was just an act on a second-rate reality show.

“Hello Alec,” Magnus said, his voice terse with too much politeness.

Feeling his heart drop at the nickname, Alec did his best not to cringe. “Magnus.” He stood up, even though he didn’t know why. Alec didn’t offer Magnus his hand to shake and neither moved for a hug. There was too much history for false shows of affection.

Magnus walked in when Alec did nothing and sat down on the chair across from Alec’s. “I’m sorry I’m late.”

“You’re not late,” Alec said immediately. “I was here early.”

“Mismatched timing,” Magnus commented, bitterness dripping from his voice. “It seems to follow us everywhere.”

Alec let that slide without a response. Instead, he took out his notebook and flipped it open to the page when he had drawn an improvised calendar marking the day of Max’s show. “We still have six months before the concert. I thought-”

“Yes, you did a lot of thinking, didn’t you? A new song?” Magnus arched an eyebrow disapprovingly. Apparently he was done ignoring Alec or responding through rude mockery. “We already have a song together. If we sing that one, we don’t have to meet up at all. We’ll make it an acoustic version or something like that. Maybe throw in some of our new hits. Works perfectly for both of us.”

“Oh, does it?” Alec narrowed his eyes at him. “Maybe you can sing about wanting to fuck me, but I can’t. I’ve told you years ago that I’m never singing that song again. Max deserves am honest song from us, not a lie.”

Magnus clenched his teeth but eventually nodded. “You’re right. Six months, hm? We can write a new song in this time.” He frowned, looking like he was considering the possibilities. “If we meet once a month, we’ll have plenty of time until October. Have your people send me your ideas next week. I’ll do the same.” With that Magnus stood up, smoothing his jacket. He nodded to himself, as if satisfied with the way the meeting went, and turned to the door. 

Alec blinked, barely believing what had just happened. It couldn’t end like this, could it? After two sleepless nights thinking about being face to face with Magnus again, he couldn’t let Magnus go just like that. he couldn’t.

And Alec wouldn’t. Not again. “Wait. We’re talking about writing a song together, not setting up a business agreement. We can’t do that over the phone or by emailing each other.”

“We won’t,” Magnus said with a long sigh. “We can talk when we meet up, once a month. Look, I’m trying to make this as comfortable as I can. Unless you want to see me every day - for hours, might I add - until the new song is finished.”

Alec didn’t have an answer to that and his hesitation seemed to be enough of a response for Magnus. “Exactly. Neither do I. Just think of this as another rule. I know how much you like your rules.”

The slap made the anger came back. Alec wanted to scream, to shake Magnus out of his perfectly crafted expression. But, as soon as it came, the anger faded into frustration and Alec was forced to face reality. “That won’t do. You were the one who taught me that music has to come from within me. If we do things this way, whatever we came up with will be a farce. Magnus, we have to… We have to talk. We have to sort out what happened between us. Otherwise, this won’t work. No matter how many rules we establish.”

It hurt to admit that, but it was the truth. Four years of writing his own songs have taught Alec a lot. Music was his voice, his art. He couldn’t force it, not when it was the only way he could escape from reality or create a better one. And Alec knew Magnus felt the same way.

But stubbornness spoke louder. “No,” Magnus said resolutely. “You were the one who said we were over, Alexander.” His voice wavered for just a second. “There is nothing either of us can say now that will change what happened.” Magnus inhaled sharply, regaining control. “We’re only doing this for Max, because we both love him. After the concert we can go back to ignoring each other. Now, if you excuse me, I have a lot to do.”

This time, when Magnus turned to the door, Alec didn’t stop him. 

\---

The thing about pretending to be fine is that it gets harder around the people you love. Magnus could fool reporters and fans by smiling and making quippy jokes. He could perform in front of hundred or thousands of people, he could hide behind an armor of clothes and makeup.

But he could not fool his mother.

Sari Bane took one look at him and raised an eyebrow knowingly. “What is wrong, anakku sayang? You look upset.”

Magnus could pretend to be surprised by his mother’s astuteness, but that would be a lie. Sari had always been very ingenious. So much so that it didn’t take her long to get used to the US after Magnus convinced her and his stepfather to move from their luxurious apartment in Jakarta to a sumptuous loft in Queens. But the proximity meant that now Sari spent half of her time working with the closest mosque and the other half surveying her son’s antics.

Thankfully, Darma was too busy with his new shop to meddle into Magnus’ life along his wife. Magnus could handle his mother, but together with his stepfather, Sari was a force to be reckoned with. He could only deal with one of them at a time, so Magnus choose to only keep a strong façade with Alexander. 

In that moment, Magnus only wanted his mom. “That’s because I am. Something happened last week. Something to do with him.”

“Oh,” Sari said quietly. She frowned just slightly and, for a second, Magnus could see anger on her delicate features. It was gone as soon as concern took over. “How about some tea?”

“Sounds delightful,” Magnus said, feeling better already. He should’ve come to visit her sooner. Spending days agonizing over writing a song had destroyed Magnus’ social life. But it hadn’t been worse than replaying the conversation with Alec in his head over and over again.

What on Earth was he thinking? ‘Have your people send me your ideas next week.’ They had the same agent; Alec’s people were Magnus’ people. Magnus was mortified. He couldn’t even be petty and smart when it came to damn Alexander, he-

“Darling, you’re making that face,” Sari said as she brought them the tea. “The one you make when you deflect things and focus on minor details.”

Magnus blinked but was able to regain his composure. “And yet, the devil is in the details.”

“Don’t bring up your father into this.” Sari took a sip of her tea and her expression was so demure, Magnus almost missed the glimmer of mischief in her eyes. He chuckled and his mother took that as encouragement to keep talking. “So, tell me what happened. And drink your tea before it grows cold.”

Dutifully, Magnus took a sip. “I agreed to work with Alexander for the next few months. We’re writing a new song that we will perform at a concert celebrating Max’s birthday. Last week was our first meeting.”

Sari’s reaction was a short nod. “I assume the meeting didn’t go well.”

“To say it was a disaster would be too kind.” Magnus sighed, playing with his cup. He traced the pattern with his finger, like he used to do as a child. Being around Sari had an interesting effect on him; Magnus felt protected but, at the same time, he was scared to death of disappointing her. Good thing Sari had never reprehended him in any way. “It’s been two years since we broke up and just seeing him gets under my skin. He wanted to talk about what happened and I… I bailed. Ran away like a coward.”

“Listen to me, son. You are no coward. You moved to the other side of the world when you were only a boy and fought hard for the life you wanted. Everything you have is the fruit of your courage.” Sari arched an eyebrow slightly. “You just have a little trouble letting people in. I know that better than anyone else. Remember when you were thirteen and used to steal my makeup? Took you an entire year to tell me it was you and not the maid. Remember what happened then?”

“You took me to the shop so we could buy my own makeup.” Magnus rolled his eyes. “That eyeliner looked better on me anyway.” He frowned, realization dawning on him “Wait. You always bring up this story when you try to guilt trip me into telling you something.”

Sari took another sip. “That’s your own fault for keeping things from me. For example, why you broke up with that man in the first place. You never told me. I had to call that reporter friend of yours but he didn’t know either. He promised he’d tell me if he did.”

“Good to know Ragnor would go behind my back so easily.” Magnus sighed. “But he told you the truth. I never… I never told anyone what really happened. It was a crazy time in my life and I had a lot to deal with, so I kind of just… I guess I thought that keeping it all to myself would make it hurt less. I was wrong.”

“Now it might be time to be right.”

A snort escaped Magnus’ mouth and he nodded. “Yes.” Magnus stared into his cup of tea, looking at his reflection. Maybe it was time indeed. “The truth is that it wasn’t because of one thing alone. There actually isn’t much more to tell than what people already know. We met on that forsaken show, we fell in love, we got together. That first month was the happiest time of my life. Just Alexander and I, away from complications and fame. But then, real life called. That was when things started to go downhill.”

Magnus inhaled deeply. “If I wanted to break into the music industry, I had to make the best from the little fame I got from participating on that show. That meant attending parties, making public appearances, releasing new songs one after the other. And Alexander… He hates all of that. He had stepped away from that world, but being with me meant being back at the center of it. It exhausted him. But he did it, mother. For me.”

“That’s a good thing, though, right?” Sari observed.

“It was. Alexander was so good, so selfless. But the media wasn’t.” Magnus clenched his teeth. After all this time, Magnus would think talking about that phase in his career would be easier, but at last, no. It still left a bitter taste in his mouth. “They couldn’t bank on a former Angel’s Voice contestant actually making it. But a reclusive singer that had just released a number one hit? That sells. After every public appearance, all articles basically read like ‘Alec Lightwood’s boyfriend, Magnus Bane’ or ‘Former Angel’s Voice contestant, Magnus Bane, the boyfriend of singer Alec Lightwood’. I was always in his shadow. It was frustrating for both of us.”

Sari frowned, looking confused. “But the articles I read-”

“- were written by Ragnor. Who is my friend and knew that this would happen. He tried to start a new trend with his blog, but it only worked after my first solo concert.” Magnus smiled fondly, remembering those hectic days. “I was finally able to create a name for myself back then and, for a while, all was good again. Until Alexander put his album on hold.” 

In retrospect, Magnus should’ve guessed how things would end right then. Alec was a good man, but he was not a saint. He made mistakes, mistakes that Magnus had been unable to oversee at the time. Mistakes that hurt more than the entire music industry coldly dismissing him until he forced it not to anymore.

Inhaling sharply, Magnus pushed the anger away. “He told the world it was because of artistic differences. He told me it was because he didn’t like the songs. That was true enough but… It wasn’t all of the truth. I overheard Alexander talking to his sister one night, when he thought I was taking a shower. He stopped the release so it wouldn’t outshine me.” Years had passed and that still stung. “He really thought I wouldn’t be able to make it if his album was out. He thought any song of his would be better than all of mine.”

“Magnus…”

“It’s true, mother. If Alexander really just wanted to stay away from the fame, he wouldn’t have released a new album just two months after our breakup. But he did.” Magnus sobbed, realizing he had been having trouble breathing. “The damn thing even won a Grammy. Best album of 2017.” He snorted bitterly.

Sari poured another cup of tea for herself. “But that wasn’t what broke you two up for good. You got engaged after that. You wouldn’t say yes if you truly thought this man didn’t appreciate and respect you.”

Magnus pushed his lips together. “We started to fight non-stop after I learned about the album. The press was all over us and Alexander… He somehow thought the engagement would get them off our backs. We loved each other, so it made sense to me. Everything went back to perfection after the announcement. For a week or so. When Luke suggested the world tour, I just had to… I had to leave. Alexander saw that. He even said that I should focus on my career. He let me go, mother.”

“By the time I was in Europe, I knew things were over between us,” Magnus continued, feeling the weight of it all catch up with him. He felt tired. “Alexander met me in London, but I knew it was only a formality. We had a stupid fight the day before on the phone and it continued when he arrived. Alexander bursted into my hotel room and demanded that we talked. But there was nothing to say anymore and he wouldn’t accept that. So, we broke up and he flew back to America on the same day. That was the worst night of my life.”

Closing his eyes, Magnus finally felt the tears stinging against the back of his eyes. He finally allowed them to fall, too exhausted to fight it. “I should’ve talked to him, I should’ve said something. But I didn’t. I just stood there, too proud to admit that I maybe was wrong. Too proud to ask him to stay. I lost Alexander that night.”

“And now,” Sari said after a few moments of silence, “you are working with him again.” She waited as Magnus nodded and finished his tea. “Anakku sayang, you loved him.”

Swallowing hard, Magnus nodded again. There was no shame in admitting that. Magnus had talked about how much he loved Alec to everyone in his life. 

But Sari had more to say. “Do you still love him?”

Now, this was a much harder question to answer. Though Magnus knew his response. He had known it for a long time, despite not wanting to admit it to himself. “I do,” Magnus whispered, afraid that saying it too loud might break him for good.

Sari poured more tea for him. Her calmness reflected on the serenity of the sound of tea hitting porcelain. In that moment, only Sari’s voice seemed to matter. “Then be the brave man I know you are and talk to him. You’ve already lost him once. Don’t punish yourself by losing him again. You deserve to be happy, my son.”

\---

The piano had always been the most present instrument in Alec’s life. His entire family was made of musicians and they all started with the piano. When he was a boy, though, Alec showed no particular talent for playing it. That set him apart, especially when Isabelle came along with her natural genius. Jace was a brilliant pianist too and that only served to make Alec hate the instrument even more. The piano represented everything that Alec couldn’t do. Everything others could do better than him.

Singing saved him from the piano. For years, Alec had come to accept and even cherished that.

But that was before he knew true suffering. Before he knew what it felt like to have his heart broken into a million pieces. Alec had always found solace in music but none of this new songs seemed good enough. Mercy had put everything into a new perspective and Alec simply couldn’t reproduce such a song that easily. 

He tried. While he and Magnus were still together, Alec spent months developing an album he ended up hating with every fiber of his being. None of those tracks really represented who he wanted to be as a musician. They were a step forward in comparison to who Alec had been before, but still... Magnus had opened his world to complete new possibilities and one step forward wouldn’t cut it anymore. He needed perfection. He needed to fix those songs, take them to another level.

And then the breakup happened and it somehow made Alec stop caring so much. He trashed the entire album and started over. It was then that his new songs came to him. _Say Something, A Thousand Years, Stitches_. Those songs emerged from Alec’s soul, they translated his feelings into music. Thirty-two days and nine songs later, Alec had put all of his misery away. 

But, after that, he had nothing left to give. Back to square one.

At least, he hadn’t been alone. Drinking with Maia, hanging out with Simon. It all helped, if only for a while. When Alec was with his friends, he forgot how much he’d failed. How much people still expected from him. How much he couldn’t live up to their expectations.

Jace and Max had been there for him too, with jokes and carefully planned distractions. His brothers loved him. They didn’t care that Alec spent too much time in his apartment, that he never went to the record company anymore. His siblings only cared about him. 

Especially Isabelle.

In the end, it had been his sister who had helped Alec to put himself together. Isabelle and the piano at the Lightwood household. She had suggested that Alec gave it another try. Isabelle even invited Maryse and, together, the two women finally convinced him to play again. Alec had nothing else to lose anyway. He couldn’t write anymore. He didn’t feel a thing. But he could play.

Playing the piano was one-third practice, one-third discipline, and one-third talent. Alec lacked the last one, so he compensated with the first two. The more he spent playing at his family’s house, the better he became. He wasn’t that little boy anymore, the one that panicked at every mistake. Alec pushed through them, learning from the mistakes instead of fearing them. As soon as the melodies filled the entire house, perfect or not, all of Alec’s worries seemed to be pushed away. There was no room for them anymore.

Singing had saved Alec’s heart, but the piano had saved his soul.

Alec ran his fingers over the keys, idly playing as he waited for his sister to get off the phone. A month had passed since he and Magnus had seen each other and, as Alec had predicted, Magnus’ plan had failed miserably. Neither of them had been able to produce anything that even resembled a new song. 

The only thing they’d managed to do was to get on Luke’s nerves. Their agent had decreed he would no longer act as an intermediary. If Alec and Magnus wanted to talk, they would have to do it by themselves.

Unsurprisingly, Magnus had gone radio silent after that. Now, he was also running late for their next meeting. Alec had reserved the music room to try and get something done that day before meeting up with Magnus again. He was thankful that Isabelle had dragged him to lunch and insisted on staying with him. She made the room full of instruments seem less lonely.

“Okay, babe. I’ll talk to you later.” Isabelle hung up and giggled, which honestly surprised Alec. His sister did seem happier with her new mysterious boyfriend, but giggling? That was too much.

As her older brother, Alec had an obligation to tease her. “By all means, take your time. I know you have the data to continue this three-hours long conversation.”

Isabelle rolled her eyes, but her fond smile ruined the gesture. “It wasn’t three hours, just a few minutes.” She approached the piano, leaning on it. “Besides, you made it clear that you didn’t want to talk during lunch.”

“I’m sorry I’m not in the mood to hear you gushing over your new boyfriend while I have to meet my ex.” Alec sighed and continued to play. “What does he do again?”

“I thought you didn’t want to know.” Isabelle smirked inconspicuously and then chuckled. “Nothing as exciting as winning Grammys every year like Magnus. He’s a doctor. No fancy parties, no running away from paparazzi. His life is completely mundane and I love it.”

A smile spread over Alec’s mouth. “I’m glad you’re having fun.”

Isabelle cocked her head to the side. “So could you. If today works out, that is.”

Alec rolled his eyes. “No. Don’t even go there.” He looked at the door and then at the clock hanging on the wall. Magnus was almost ten minutes late. Maybe he wasn’t even coming. “This is a work thing and nothing else. I tried talking to him and he wouldn’t have it.” Hands moving faster over the piano keys, Alec let his growing frustration tone up the music. The angry melody reflected his heart. “It’s pointless, Iz. It was pointless in London and it’s pointless now.”

That seemed to placate his sister’s amusement. Isabelle sat down beside Alec. “You never told me exactly what happened in London.”

The melody took a dramatic turn as Alec let the sadness pour through his fingers. This exercise helped him to organize this thoughts. Alec had never been good at reproducing other musicians’ pieces but this? Randomly pressing the keys until they translated what he felt? That he could do. 

“There’s nothing to tell,” Alec said quietly. “The engagement was clearly a mistake from the beginning. After all, it ended with Magnus fleeing to focus on his career. He made his choice while I pretended to not to have noticed what was going on. I don’t blame him, though. After that ugly mess with my album… I’d give up on me too.”

“Big brother…” Isabelle laid a hand on his shoulder, but Alec shook his head.

“It’s true, Izzy. I almost didn’t catch that flight to London. We were barely talking anymore, only a couple of texts. But I had to be certain, so I went to meet him.” Alec huffed. “He wouldn’t even receive me at the airport; he was too engrossed with his own concert. I took a cab all the way to the hotel and I tried to think of what to say, of how to tell him that I still loved him. But I screwed up. I… I was so mad and he was so mad. I lost sight of what truly mattered.”

Isabelle pressed her lips together, shoulders dropping. “Did you try calling him from the airport? When you were coming?”

Alec nodded. “He was already on his way to the concert. I didn’t get a chance to speak to him. I tried calling again when I got back to New York, but he didn’t answer. And then he was in Asia and with the time difference it was nearly impossible to get a hold of him. It didn’t matter because when Magnus got back, I tried one last time but he still didn’t answer my call. That’s when I knew I had lost him for good.”

Stopping at a particular key, Alec closed his eyes. Isabelle was asking questions she had already asked before. Alec was done explaining to her why he knew that it was over. He simply did and he had been right. Magnus was gone, out of his reach. It had been Alec’s own fault for pushing him away, for not fighting hard enough for them.

He had loved Magnus. In fact, Alec didn’t think he could ever love anyone else the way he’d loved Magnus. He had tried finding love again in the beds of nameless men, but none of them had stayed for more than a few weeks. Besides, Alec knew all of those relationships were doomed from the start. They couldn’t give him what he actually wanted - and that was Magnus Bane.

The man he had loved. The man he still loved.

Alec opened his eyes, gasping. Isabelle stopped talking at once, looking at him with a curious expression. Ignoring her, Alec let his hands work. They flew over the keys again, but this time he had a purpose. Sadness and melancholy met with longing and desperation as Alec played. Sounds came out of that mix and Alec kept playing. The melody was sorrow turned into tones. An insistent beat pulsed the song to come out.

“I found it,” Alec whispered, stunned.

Suddenly, the door opened, interrupting the question Isabelle was about to make. Magnus walked in, two cups of coffee in hands. “Alexander, I’m so sorry I’m late. I-” He stopped, looking at the Lightwood siblings over the rim of his sunglasses. “I stopped for coffee because I thought we’d need the boost if we wanted to write this song. But now I see I’m missing a cup. Hello, dear Isabelle. You look exquisite as always.”

Isabelle smiled and stood up. “So do you. Did you get a tan?”

“Only if it’s from the lights of a filming camera.” Magnus chuckled. “I-”

“Magnus,” Alec interrupted him hastily, fingers yearning to play again. “I found our melody.”

“Oh.” Magnus raised his eyebrows and stepped closer, leaving the coffee on the nearby table. “On the piano? I thought you didn’t play.”

Smirking, Isabelle indicated for Magnus to take her seat. “He does now.”

Magnus moved and sat beside Alec. Having him so close was electrifying even if they weren’t touching. It fuelled Alec with a confidence he thought he had long lost. 

Alec played the melody again, embrancing its highs and lows as he went. The melody was so clear in his head, he only had to let it out. All the angst, the need for something. The sounds never stopped, never relented as the emotion grew stronger. Alec added a brief pause and then the emotion was back, stronger than ever. More sure than Alec had ever been.

When it was over, Alec looked at Magnus and found him smiling. “Gorgeous, Alexander,” Magnus said and it felt sincere. He hesitated for a second, though, opening his mouth two times before speaking up. “May I… May I make a suggestion?”

“Sure,” Alec said with a nod. His heart was racing inside of his chest, finding it hard to breathe as he waited.

Magnus fidgeted with his rings. He’d seem anxious if he wasn’t, well, Magnus Bane. “What do you think of adding a violin to it? Right after you stopped?” 

Alec’s jaw dropped. “It’s perfect.”

“All right,” Isabelle said and grabbed one of the cups Magnus had brought. “I’ll leave you boys to it. It was great seeing you, Magnus. Bye, big bro.” She smiled cheekily at them, grabbed the second cup too and left. Somehow, she managed to close the door behind her just using her foot.

Arching an eyebrow, Magnus stared at the door. “Did she just steal our coffee?”

“She does that.” Alec sighed. “Thank you for bringing some anyway. You didn’t have to.”

“Actually,” Magnus elaborated every syllable of the word and then looked at Alec out of the corner of his eyes. “I think I did, as an apology for how our last meeting went. Alexander… You were right, we do need to talk. So… Do you want to go somewhere and have a coffee with me?”

Alec blinked, genuinely surprised. His heart was about to burst inside of his chest in anticipation. He had wanted to hear those words from Magnus for so long, Alec had even given up on that actually happening outside of his dreams. He thought he’d combust right then and there.

However, for some reason, hearing Magnus say those words made Alec find peace. He nodded, feeling hopeful at last. “I’d love to.”

Magnus smiled brightly. “I know just the place.”

\---

“A cafe machiatto with a pinch of whiskey and a double espresso, extra strong,” Woolsey said, putting the drinks in front of Magnus, “for you and your former but soon to be again boyfriend, I assume.”

Magnus snorted, rolling his eyes. “The point of me coming to your coffee shop is to keep my life private, darling. That implies no comments on who I bring here with me. Or my relationship status.” 

After all, the secret door that lead to the Praetus Lupus didn’t open to everyone. Only the people close to its founder, Woolsey Scott, had access to the place. Magnus had met Woolsey in college and they quickly became friends. Well, with benefits.

Still, Magnus couldn’t have known back then that Woolsey would found such an exclusive club. There were only a handful of members, all of them people who appreciated discretion. To become a member you had to be personally approved by Woolsey and consistently work on yourself to better the community. It seemed that the idealistic prep boy from college had found a way to merge his dreams with his lifestyle after all.

Lucky Magnus. After fame swiped his privacy away, he could count on Woolsey to disappear for a couple of hours. The club’s coffee shop was always Magnus’ favorite among the various establishments the Praetus Lupus owned over the city, especially because his friend was frequently there.

“I’m not making a comment.” Woolsey chuckled to himself when Magnus threw him a disdainful look. “I’m caring for my establishment. You know the rules; don’t bring people here that you don’t fully trust. That only leads to one possible conclusion.”

Sighing, Magnus grabbed the drinks. “You’ve always been too smart for your own good. Wish me luck.”

“You’ve never needed luck before, Magnus. You don’t need it now.”

Magnus hoped that was true. Inhaling deeply, he carried the drinks to the back of the shop, where Alec was seated. Magnus had to stop for a second when he caught sight of him, though. Ever since the first time he had laid eyes on a picture of Alec, Magnus had admired his beauty. The singer had grown up on the tabloids and magazines, so it was easy for Magnus to feel like he knew Alec before he actually did.

For all the ridiculousness that was the Angel’s Voice, the show had proven that Magnus knew very little of the real Alec. And he had loved to correct that image of Alec in those few months. Alec, the popular singer, was a gorgeous man. But Alexander, the man behind that persona, was a gorgeous person all around. 

And it wasn’t too bad that he’d grown even more gorgeous over time. Physically speaking. Magnus smiled and walked to him, taking a seat. “I assumed you needed something strong. I know I do.”

Alec snorted, taking his cup. “Thank you. You’re probably right.” He waited for Magnus to take a sip of his macchiato, which was impressive considering how Alec’s eyes were full of anticipation. It never ceased to amaze Magnus just how much of Alec’s emotions were written on his face when he allowed them to be. “Magnus, I’m sorry,” Alec continued. “About that whole mess with the album, I… I was so wrong to think anything I released would ever outshine your songs. It was a ridiculous thought, I’m sorry.”

“It’s in the past,” Magnus said, realizing suddenly that the anger he felt was gone. One apology and it was gone. “Besides, you hated that album.”

A chuckle escaped Alec’s mouth, relieved and honest. “I did. Those songs were an atrocity.”

“I liked the ones you released afterward.” Magnus smiled fondly. “Some were very sad, but they were so… raw. I listened to that follow-up album for days.”

Alec smiled at that, his hazel eyes shining. “You’re the one to talk. Hugely successful world tour and three Grammys to take home to. I think I had _Wherever I Go_ stuck in my ears for weeks. I don’t know how many times I listened to it, but it was still fewer than how many times I heard _Locked Out of Heaven_. That song was everywhere.”

“They were about you.” Magnus didn’t know where this sudden candor had come from, but he was happy for it. The expression on Alec’s face made the exposure worth it. “That album, the one you released right after we broke up. Was I right to assume...?”

“Yes, it was about you.” Alec closed his mouth, a touch of seriousness scurried over his face. “It was hard. I knew I had screwed up the moment I went back to the airport. And when you didn’t return my calls, I had to find another way to pour all of that out of my chest.”

Magnus frowned. “Your calls? With an ‘s’? You only called me when you were still in London and I was on my way to the concert.”

Mimicking Magnus’ expression, Alec shook his head. “No. I called you when I got back to New York and then a hundred times after that. I thought you were still mad, so I stopped for a while. Then I called you again when you came back from your tour, but your assistant told me to quit bothering you.”

Shock ran through Magnus’ body until realization hit him like a truck. “My assistant. Do you mean Lorenzo Rey?” Alec looked puzzled. Of course, Alec had no idea what had happened. Luke had been able to kill the story before it hit the press. “Rey was working for Sebastian. He’d sent Rey to infiltrate Luke’s label and work for me. The idea was sabotaging my career. I guess when he couldn’t do that, Rey settled for sabotaging my love life.”

“What?!” Indignantly, Alec gasped for air, straightening up in his chair.

Seeing Alec so affected by the news made Magnus’ heart jump. Together with Luke, Magnus had taken care of the entire Lorenzo Rey story. Sebastian seemed to have given up after that, as Magnus never heard of him again. Still, the righteous anger on Alec’s face was… appreciated. “Don’t worry, darling. It’s been taken care of and my career is as solid as I could ever hope for.”

Alec exhaled, lunging back in his chair. He took a long sip of his drink. “So is your love life.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Magnus blinked.

“You’re dating that antique collector,” Alec said with what Magnus hoped was a hint of bitterness in his voice. There was something there for sure.

It was hard not to grin. “Dot? We broke up over a year ago.” Magnus chuckled when Alec was about to protest. “Don’t believe the pictures in a magazine. She and I are still friends, that’s all. Truth be told, I was solely in for the friendship which she quickly realized. Well, the friendship and those marvellous vases she gets for me whenever I redecorate the loft.” Magnus chuckled again. “I’m a single man. Have been for quite some time now.”

“Oh,” was all the answer Magnus got for that.

Magnus coughed when the silence between them became unbearable. “I guess we should talk about London too.” Magnus swallowed hard. “And how I should have picked you up at the airport.”

Alec shook his head. “It was childish of me to want you to do that. You were busy preparing for your concert.”

“A concert I was doing as an excuse to flee our engagement.” Saying it out loud for the first time hurt. But it was cleansing at the same time. “I didn’t want to admit at the time, but I was running away from you. You were right when you said that.”

Whatever kind of excitement was on Alec’s face, it left immediately. His shoulders dropped and Alec winced, as if Magnus had just slapped him in the face. “I wish I wasn’t.”

“If it helps, you were wrong about why I was running away.” Magnus stared at his cup but forced himself to look at Alec again. He had to be looking him in the eyes when he explained himself. “I was scared and hurt. The whole thing with your album and the media still talking about me like I was only an attachment to you... I thought the marriage would make that never go away. That it would suffocate any chances of us ever working as a real couple instead of a star and his boyfriend. You seemed so sure that a marriage would solve our problems… But I doubted that because I thought we were doing it for the wrong reasons. But not because of what I felt for you. I’ve never second guessed that. I loved you.”

I still do.

“I loved you too,” Alec said in a quiet, honest voice. “And I’m sorry that wasn’t enough back then. I’d do things differently if I could.”

Magnus smiled and it surprised him. Even through all the sadness, he could still smile. “Me too.” Magnus breathed in, trying to keep the tears away. The conversation had put an end to four years of misery. A long-needed end. But it didn’t have to be a sad moment. Maybe, from now on, Alec and he could be friends. 

Having Alec back in his life would make Magnus happy, no matter to which extent. “I’m glad we did this.” Magnus smiled a little more.

Alec sighed in relief and took another sip. “I needed it.”

“The coffee or the heart to heart?”

“You,” Alec said simply, as if it was nothing. “You changed my life, Magnus. I was a different person before I met you, a much repressed person. In these years without talking to you, I realized I got dangerously close to becoming that person again. I’ve been taking time away from the spotlight because I keep convincing myself that I need it. But I don’t want to live like this anymore. I love music and I’m tired of letting the bad side of fame chase me away from it. When you were there with me, I didn’t feel this way. So... It felt wrong to not be talking to you. Made me weaker.”

And, with that, the maybe became a certainty. Magnus had Alec back in his life. All it took was for Magnus to be brave again. To be the man he could see reflected in Alec’s bright eyes.

Magnus raised his cup. “Here’s for coming back into each other’s life.”

As their cups clicked against each other and Alec smiled again, Magnus felt like he was reborn. Like he had found what was missing all along. And, this time, he would not let it go again.

\---

For some reason, a part of Alec childishly hoped that making up with Magnus would make things go back to what they used to be. In his idealistic mind, one single talk would solve everything, erase every resentment between them. He hadn’t been completely wrong: working with Magnus had become so much better now. But he hadn’t been entirely right either.

Their apologies meant something but they didn’t replace real effort to improve their relationship. Two years have passed since they were part of each other’s lives. Things have changed and there was no coming back from that.

However, different didn’t mean bad. In fact, Alec quite enjoyed the new dynamic between them. Magnus and he had met a couple of times during the following two months in order to fine-tune the melody of their song and it had been great. Discovering who Magnus Bane was all over again was a journey Alec would happily take every single time. Especially now since there was no power imbalance between them anymore. Magnus was no longer a competitor Alec had connected with but an artist in his own right. He was even more popular than Alec himself.

Which meant the music industry was fair after all. Raw talent could take someone to the very top. Alec would’ve never guessed.

Fame and success had only given Magnus the assurance he needed. He had always exuded an easy confidence and that had been one of the first things that Alec found attractive in him. But now, Magnus owned that. He had proven that he could make it on his own.

What a difference that made. Alec didn’t have to take calls from the press away from Magnus anymore or worry that Luke’s calls would hurt his feelings. If anything, now it was Magnus’ phone that didn’t stop ringing. Magnus tried really hard to ignore the calls whenever they spent time together, but Alec just snorted. 

He was too proud of Magnus to take offense. Like in that moment when Magnus hung up and looked at Alec apologetically. “Again, I’m very sorry, Alexander. I’m turning this thing off right now.”

“It’s not a problem,” Alec said between a chuckle. He smirked, arching an eyebrow. “Maybe you’re getting another offer to guest star in a movie.”

The icy glare Magnus shot at his direction was enough of an answer but one shouldn’t underestimate Magnus Bane’s dramatic vein. He shook his head, eyes shining dangerously. “Not funny, Alexander. I’m never stepping on a movie set again. I love myself too much.”

That only made Alec laugh, though he didn’t know if it was because of Magnus’ exaggerated reaction or because he was back to calling Alec by his full name. It just felt right when he said it. Alec had a remark ready but his phone buzzed on the table, interrupting him. That was one of those days, hm?

“Sorry,” Alec said and looked at the screen. A text from Luke asking where he was. Weird, Luke knew Alec was with Magnus at the record label. Alec texted his agent an answer and looked at Magnus. “You know what? I think you’re right. We should turn off our phones for the rest of the afternoon.”

Magnus smiled brightly. “Deal. Just you and me.”

Ignoring how those words made him shiver, Alec turned off his phone and put it away. He watched Magnus do the same. It was hard not to think about how much more intimate the meeting felt after that. A phone call could - and had - saved Alec from making a fool of himself before. Every once in a while, Alec wanted to praise Magnus on something he did or said, or simply say something that was in his mind. But doing that would only make things weird between them.

Shutting the outside world like that made policing himself more difficult but Alec would do it, for the sake of their friendship. He would not lose Magnus again. His mistake had made Magnus ran away but he was back now. Alec could stop looking for him in strangers.

“All right,” Magnus said and stood up to grab his violin. Alec had asked him when he’d learned to play the instrument exactly, but Magnus had just stared at him as if he’d asked a stupid question. Then again, Alec ought to know Magnus Bane could do anything. “Let’s play the melody again. Maybe this time the lyrics will finally come along.”

Alec sighed but took his place at the piano either way. “Forty-eighth time is the charm.”

Magnus snorted but otherwise just gestured for Alec to get ready. They had decided that Magnus would sing first and that it would be a sort of longing song. It fit the melody: a lost love the character wanted to get back. Alec had thought Magnus would slap him when he suggested it, but Magnus had only nodded and said it made sense.

“Remember, Alexander,” Magnus said, voice low as he entered his creative zone. He paused a hand on the recorder they had brought to help in the creative process. “His love is lost to him. He doesn’t know what happened or what drove her away. But she’s gone and he can’t help but search for her. He has already forgiven her; he just wants her back.”

Exhaling, Alec started to play when he heard the sound of the recorder being turned on. By then, Alec’s fingers were so used to the melody, he didn’t have to think. That was probably a good thing because his mind was a turmoil of thoughts. Was it a mistake to compose this song with Magnus? It did hurt sometimes, but just being near Magnus was worth all the heartbreak. 

Alec didn’t have much more time to contemplate that, though. Suddenly, Magnus began to sing. The words finally came, giving form to the sentiment of the melody. It was a story of loss and love. No anger, just a lover who wanted it all back. He and his love were equals, two souls that had found it all in each other.

Magnus’ falsetto voice finished the first verse but Alec kept playing. He was too enthralled to stop. Magnus was staring at him, completely stunned by what had just happened. When Alec smiled at him, though, Magnus smiled back. 

The melody paused for just enough for Magnus to pick up his violin. They started to play together, the sounds of the piano and the violin merging into one. For a while, Alec didn’t want to add anything else to that sound. When he felt it was, though, he let his own voice dance around the melody. Alec took some of Magnus’ words and made them his own.

Eyes closed, Magnus smiled and came up with the next part. Alec was happy that Magnus couldn’t see him because at some point tears started to form in his eyes. Alec didn’t give Magnus’ words a chance to linger on; he started to sing his emotions away as soon as Magnus was done.

At some point, Magnus joined him and Alec had to refrain himself from choking on his emotion. They finished the last verse together and Magnus stopped playing the violin. Alec, however, couldn’t. He continued to let his fingers fly over the keys until his heart told him to stop.

A comfortable silence fell upon them and Alec swallowed back his tears. He was still catching his breath when he felt Magnus taking the seat at his side.

“Alexander,” Magnus whispered and only then Alec realized how deeply moved Magnus looked. Taking a deep breathe, Magnus steadied himself. He brought a hand to Alec’s face, gently wiping away a tear. “We did it.”

“Yes,” Alec breathed out. He couldn’t resist holding Magnus’ hands with his own. “We have our song.”

Magnus nodded, but his eyes didn’t seem to be able to focus. He laced their fingers together. “I… Alexander, I-”

Alec gasped for air, feeling the urge to kiss Magnus. Friendship be damned, he couldn’t pretend not to feel what he felt. Not when Magnus was right there, looking like he still loved him too. 

Alec moved forward.

But the piercing sound of the record label’s phone burst their bubble, freezing Alec in place. Magnus seemed to have been shaken out of the same stupor but he stood up, marching to the phone. “What?” Magnus hissed, grabbing the phone’s handler with unrequited strength. 

Something was wrong. Alec didn’t know what exactly but, by the way Magnus’ anger slowly turned into dread as he listened to the caller, Alec could guess it was big.

“Thank you for the heads-up,” Magnus said, voice considerably calmer now. He hung up and looked at Alec with a worried expression on his face. “Alexander, we have a problem. Someone leaked the news we’re working on a song together.” 

Alec considered the implications of that for a second. “That’s not the end of the world.”

“No,” Magnus agreed. “But that’s not the worst part.” He breathed in and out. “The entire block is surrounded by paparazzi. They know we’re here and they are waiting for us to come out. I’m afraid there’s no way to avoid them, darling.” 

\---

Truth be told, Magnus expected Alec to throw a tantrum. If there was one thing that always got under Alec’s skin it were paparazzi. His reaction was always over exaggerated, which, in turn, had resulted in many fights between the two of them. Magnus had never been a fan of these vultures but he knew an artist needed them. When his career was on the rise, Magnus would sometimes sought out paparazzi to photograph him as a way to get free publicity. 

It drove Alec absolutely crazy. 

Understandably so. For someone who had grown up with the media monitoring every step he took, Alec turned out to be surprisingly normal. That didn’t mean that he enjoyed all of that constant attention, though. The Lightwood name made people expect something of him and Alec had almost lost himself trying to living up to that. 

Now that Magnus didn’t need the paps anymore, he shared the inane hatred for them. In fact, Magnus was very close to flipping off himself.

To Magnus’ surprise, though, Alec just - civilly - cursed under his breath. “Fuck.”

Snorting, Magnus agreed with a firm nod. “How do you want to do this? I could leave first and you could wait until they are gone. Or the other way around.”

Alec shook his head. “I don’t think all of them would follow just one of us. If they think we’re both in here, some will stay behind.” Alec mused over the possibilities and then reached for the phone he’d left on the table. He turned it on and snorted at the torrent of texts from Luke that appeared on the screen. “At least now we know what all of those phone calls were about.”

“That we do,” Magnus said with a chuckle. He turned his phone on too and it almost crashed due to all the Twitter notifications. He really had to remember to keep those turned off. “Seems like the news hit social media too.” Magnus looked around, pressing his lips together. “What if we just stay here? I’m pretty sure Luke has a bed somewhere in the building. He spends way too many nights here not to do it comfortably.”

A sparkle fluttered in Alec’s eyes but he shook his head again. “How about we just work on the song for now? Let them wait for us. That’s what they are here for isn’t it?” 

Magnus had to admit he was blown away. Alec had matured beautifully in the last two years, but this was a whole new level of personal transformation. A part of Magnus kept waiting for that calm façade to fall apart as they worked on their song for hours. It never did. Alec was entirely focused on the song and polishing up the lyrics. 

He had never been able to shut things out like that. Magnus remembered how the mere idea of someone waiting to take a picture of Alec at the end of an event would throw him off. Alec would usually spend the entire night in a foul mood, dragging Magnus down with him. Nothing could distract him and Magnus had to put a lot of effort on lightening the mood. It got to a point where neither of them wanted Alec to attend anything anymore.

But now? There Alec was, carefully revising their first draft of the lyrics as if nothing happened. He laughed at Magnus quips, even made some of his own. No anxious glares toward the door, no increasing frowns. Just Alec in that fascinating state of mind he got to when creating music.

Magnus never wanted to kiss him so badly. 

When they finally left the building, at almost four in the morning, only a handful of paparazzi were still hanging around on the streets. They were easily avoidable, but Alec surprised Magnus again by not even trying to. Luke had already taken precautions by announcing their partnership online. Max, bless him, had quoted the tweet, adding how excited he was that Alec and Magnus had accepted his invitation to work together again. With the truth out, the value of those pictures was severely reduced.

Still, Alec did let them take his picture as he walked Magnus to his car. “Are you sure you don’t want a ride? It’s really no problem,” Magnus said as he looked with concern at the cluster of cameras turned their way.

Alec shook his head. “I’ll Uber home. It’s not far away and it’s better than letting them see us leaving together.”

There was no arguing against that. Yet, Magnus only relaxed when Alec texted him thirty minutes later to let him know he’d made it home safely. 

The following day was flooded with articles about them. Most were full of mean-spirited speculation about their love life, though Magnus was able to find a couple that actually talked about the new song they were working on. He forwarded those to Alec and got a call back almost right away. They had a good laugh at the theories on what their new song could be about. Magnus was relieved none had even came close to the real thing.

After their outing, there was no going back to secrecy anymore. The following weeks were dedicated to rehearsals and the eyes of the world on Magnus’ and Alec’s every move. At some point, Luke had suggested that they should change their meeting point. With their fans combined showing up everyday to catch a glimpse of them, the record label’s doors seemed to be constantly occupied by screaming teenagers. That wasn’t exactly the most productive of environments.

Magnus had a good laugh when he fed Ragnor a bunch of wrong new locations where he was supposedly meeting up with Alec. Ragnor sent his readers all around New York to search for them, from Magnus’ loft in Brooklyn to Alec’s apartment on the Upper East Side. But nobody ever found them.

It served Ragnor right for talking to Magnus’ mother behind his back.

Not even Luke knew where they met. The only other person who did was Woolsey, as he provided Magnus and Alec a safe heaven right in the middle of the city. The Praetus Lupus had a music room whose key Woolsey gave to Magnus. He and Alec would meet there three times a week and only come out when it was dark outside. Two months had been enough for them to rehearse, talk, and reconnect. Everything was perfect again.

Although, Magnus had one minor complaint. That moment they shared when singing their song for the first time never happened again. It seemed they were doomed to a life of just friendship after all, something forever hanging in the air that neither of them dared to address. 

Not that it was bad to be friends with Alec. Magnus loved it. He’d missed Alec’s friendship just as much as the romantic side of their relationship. A testimony of how good they were to each other was the new umprompt songs each of them wrote while hanging out. Alec’s _There’s Nothing Holding Me Back_ had resulted from Magnus trying to tease him into dancing by playing the guitar. Magnus had no luck there, but the song effortless was victory enough. Watching Alec sing so freely took Magnus back to their one-on-one sessions during the Angel’s Voice and the moment when Magnus realized his celebrity crush had turned into real love.

Magnus’ _The Greatest_ , on the other hand, was the result of a particularly lazy afternoon where neither of them wanted to do anything other than simply hang out together. It had been a joke at first but Alec’s insistence that Magnus continued to play his guitar turned it into more. ‘Stamina’ became an inside joke of theirs shortly after that.

Being friends with Alec made Magnus’ life brighter. Things finally made sense again and he was happier than he had been in a long, long time. But yet, Magnus couldn’t help himself but wanting more. 

\---

The backstage of a concert was a chaotic place. Producers buzzed around, followed closely by neurotic sound and light technicians. The dress rooms were filled too. Makeup artists ran from one artist to the next while the people from the clothing department rushed to make sure every detail was in place. None of them, however, were worse than the anxious artists ready to walk on stage.

For some reason, though, Alec enjoyed that mess of colors and sounds. It felt like a battlefield, one that he had mastered over the years. All he had to do was finding a center, a target to shoot at when he needed to ground himself. 

At Max’s Birthday Concert, that center was Magnus. Whenever Alec needed to push away the overwhelming feeling of imminent failure, he’d look at Magnus and All those doubts vanished when he did that. Funny enough, Magnus was probably just as nervous as Alec. He had only to look at the way Magnus fidgeted with his rings or hugged his belly to know. And yet, Magnus’ presence alone was enough to calm Alec’s nerves.

“Hey,” Alec said quietly when Magnus tried to fix his perfectly styled hair once again “It’s going to be fine.”

Magnus blinked, caught off guard for a second. He blinked again and his confidence was back in place. “Of course it will, darling. After all, we’re doing this together.”

“That’s nice to hear,” Maia’s voice interrupted Alec’s response to that but he smiled at her when she approached. “And it’s even nicer to see you two talking again.” Maia frowned, though, hesitant “You guys are talking, right? This is not just a ruse to sell tickets, right?”

Alec huffed. “We are one hundred percent talking to each other.”

“Well, I’d say eighty percent talking, ten percent giggling, and the other ten percent is us gazing longingly at each other’s eyes.” Magnus joked although there was an edge to his voice that Alec couldn’t quite put his finger on it. “But you know, a man can dream.”

Feeling his breath caught in his throat, Alec swallowed hard. Where had that come from? They had a moment when coming up with their song’s lyrics, but ever since then nothing like that had happened again. Even Magnus’ flirtatious side hadn’t make a comeback, to Alec’s immense disappointment. And now… this.

Alec’s racing heartbeat made him grow frustrated. “A-anyway, it’s true. We’re… friends again.”

Maia looked from Alec to Magnus, suspicion written all over her face. Eventually, though, she seemed to decide not to comment on that. Instead, she just hugged Magnus, tapped Alec on the shoulder, and went to get ready Max was already performing his summer hit, _The Lazy Song_ , and Maia would be the next one to get on the stage to sing her _Scars to your Beautiful_.

Alec barely heard the performances, though. He had seen Max on their way to the concert, but otherwise it seemed like Alec’s brain could only register Magnus on that day. What Magnus was wearing, the way Magnus’ hair was pushed up in a mohawk. His nervous laugh, his sweet flirting. Magnus and only Magnus.

When it was finally time for their performance, Alec felt almost relieved. The only problem was that, sitting down in front of the piano in the darkness of a closed curtains, Alec understood what was happening to him. After the show, he and Magnus would have no excuse to see each other anymore.

It was over and Alec couldn’t deal with that.

“We got this, Alexander,” Magnus whispered to him as their names were announced to a roaring crowd. 

But Alec didn’t have time to answer. The curtains opened and the light of the stage immediately blinded him. Alec knew he was supposed to give a small introduction of their song. He even had a short speech prepared. He’d also talk about the time he coached Max in the Angel’s Voice and how that mentorship brought them closer together. And, yet, Alec couldn’t utter a single word. The silence of the crowd was as staggering as knowing that he was about to lose Magnus again.

“Good evening,” Magnus took over, charming as ever. The crowd began to roar and Magnus laughed into his microphone. He was saying things, probably the introduction Alec was meant to give. But Alec didn’t pay that any mind. His attention was caught by something else; Max, smiling at him from behind the stage.

 

Magnus made a flourish with his hand. “Now, Alec and I-” He looked at Alec, his eyes expressing only just showing a hint of concern. “Alexander and I have something special prepared for tonight.” When Alec nodded, Magnus smiled brightly. “Without further ado, this is our new song: _Where’s My Love?_ ”

The lights went off and, this time, Alec was ready for when they came back. He started playing, the memories pouring into his mind. The air was filled with the sound of the piano and suddenly Alec didn’t care for the crowd anymore. The stage morphed into the room at Luke’s record label. There were only Magnus and him there.

“Cold bones, yeah, that’s my love,” Magnus began to sing, violin in his hands. “She glides away, like a ghost.” He looked at Alec, eyes shining fraught with meaning. Magnus sang into the microphone, every word sending a shiver down Alec’s body. “Does she know that we bleed the same? Don’t wanna cry but I break that way.”

Alec took a deep breathe and kept playing. The movement of his hands grounded him as he realized why they had written those words together. What they truly meant.

He stopped playing and that moment of silence washed away all his doubts. Alec was not going to lose Magnus. They had found each other again and they always would.

Magnus started to play the violin at the same time that Alec resumed playing the piano. The lyrics left Alec’s lips easily, the words were no longer a sad plea but a burning certainty. “Cold sheets, oh, where’s my love?” Alec infused his crescendo with that certainty, letting it chase away his doubts. “I am searching high, I’m searching low in the night. Does she know that we bleed the same? Don’t wanna cry but I break that way.”

The chorus came and Magnus and Alec sang it together. “Did she run away? Did she run away? I don’t know.” 

Once, they had both walked away from their relationship. Not anymore. There was no place for sorrow, they had forgiven each other. All they wanted now was a new chance. One chance to make it better and brighter than ever before. 

“If she ran away, if she ran away, come back home. Just come home.”

They played together again. Alec gasped when their eyes locked and neither of them dared to look away. Magnus smiled contently, but it only showed in his eyes. The smile mashed with the lyrics, with that terrible fear of losing everything forever. But they hadn’t. They were right there, ready to start over. 

“I got a fear. Oh, in my blood,” Magnus sang. “She was carried up into the clouds, high above.”

“If you bled, I bleed the same,” Alec chanted and then their voices blended together again. “If you’re scared, I’m on my way. Did you run away? Did you run away?” 

Magnus breathed out. “I don’t need to know.”

One last time, they sang together. “If you ran away, if you ran away, come back home.”

“Just come home,” Alec sang, not to the thousand of people in the crowd but to the one person he shared the stage with.

Playing the last part of the melody was the hardest thing Alec had ever done in his life. He knew Magnus had put down his violin and was approaching the piano. When Alec pressed the last keys, though, he was barely registering anything else. All he saw, out of the corner of his eyes, was Max signaling for someone in the background.

Then the curtain closed, shielding them away from the world again. Magnus was staring at Alec, his expression unreadable. But Alec didn’t have to read it. He knew what Magnus was thinking already.

Standing up, Alec pulled Magnus closer while their lips smashed together in an urgent kiss. Magnus’ hands grabbed Alec’s by his coat and the kiss burst into flames. The world stopped spinning and nothing else mattered. Even when they parted away, just mere inches to catch on their breaths and make sure that it was real, it didn’t stop.

“I love you,” Alec said, laying his forehead against Magnus’.

In that proximity, he could feel it when Magnus smiled back at him. “I love you too.”

And nothing in the world could ever break them apart.

\---

_April, 2022_

_Hello, avid readers. This is your favorite reporter, Ragnor Fell, bringing you the juiciest news of your favorite celebrities here on my humble blog._

_I’m ecstatic to report that the Malec Wedding finally happened. Three years after they got back together, Magnus Bane and Alec Lightwood tied the knot in what was the most disgustingly romantic ceremony yours truly has ever had the privilege to attend. The wedding was a private event, so of course there will be no videos or pictures on this blog of teary-eyed Magnus serenading_ I Won’t Give Up _to equally teary-eyed Alec. You guys can find that on Youtube._

_Here, you will only find transcripts of the grooms’ vows. Beware: they contain teethrooting stuff such as ‘I can’t live without you’ and ‘I can’t stop thinking about you.’ You’ve been warned._

_As the now husband and husband enjoy their honeymoon, we mere mortals are left to wonder what will happen next. After Alec’s announcement last year of a career shift from singer to songwriter and composer, we can expect anything, really. Not to worry, though. If singer/dancer/actor (!!) Magnus Bane decides to tackle another musical, my blog will be the first to let you guys know._

_Regardless, I for one am expecting only good things from this #relationshipgoals couple. The world can only handle one Malec Breakup. It is a good thing, then, that the grooms seem to be just as much in love with each other as we are with them._

_Oh, before you go feast your eyes on the pictures of the ceremony, don’t forget to vote for when we can expect the first Malec Baby! Results may or may not be used to pressure the love birds the next time I get to see them._

_For now, though, let’s all wish the happily married couple all the happiness in the world. They have earned it for sure._

**Author's Note:**

> The end. For real now.
> 
> A huge thank you to me beta [sweetautumnleaves](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sweetautumnleaves/pseuds/sweetautumnleaves). Anica, I love you even more for doing this <3 I swear!
> 
> I'm on [Tumblr](https://ketzwrites.tumblr.com/) and on [Twitter](http://twitter.com/Ketz_CML/). Kudos and comments are always appreciated!
> 
> Ketz


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